Archive for September, 2009

Obama, in what appears to be an off-the-record comment, called Kanye West as “jack***.”

He’s right and I couldn’t agree more.  He should go ahead and make it an on-the-record comment.

Who is Kayne Kanye West?  Good question.  I would guess that 95% of America doesn’t know who this guy is.  And he doesn’t like not being well-known.

Kayne Kanye West is a “musician” who throws temper tantrums when he isn’t recognized for accomplishment or when he thinks someone is discriminated against.  This guy sees more conspiracy theories behind every story than the “9-11 Truth Movement” folks.

Last night during the MTV Awards, he interrupted the young Country star Taylor Swift, who was giving some remarks after accepting an award for best female video.  Apparently, West didn’t think Swift deserved the award, so he walked on stage and grabbed the microphone from her and said that the best video was Beyonce’ (does she have a last name?).

The humiliated Swift – all of about 18 years-old – couldn’t even finish after he handed the microphone back.

West has a history of outrageous thuggery – and always with a racial twist.

Who can forget this little beauty when Mike Myers and Kayne Kanye West were a part of the effort to raise money for the victims of hurricane Katrina.  It would be funny if it weren’t so outrageous.  Poor Mike Myers, one of the funniest people on earth, was stuck on live TV standing next to this guy as he inarticulately (to put it mildly) said that troops had been sent to New Orleans with permission to shoot Black people and inexplicably blurted out, “George Bush doesn’t care about Black people.”

I couldn’t name a song the guy sings – nor if I heard one of his “songs” would I know it was him – so it’ll be hard for me to boycott him. But you can guarantee, I would boycott him if I knew what the heck he “sang.”

UPDATE:  OK, so I can’t even spell his first name right – so be it.  I did not watch the MTV Music Awards, but knew something was up last night when twitter traffic was off the charts about West. Frankly, I’m glad I didn’t waste any time watching the show.

I’ve been asked by a number of people what I thought of Congressman Joe Wilson’s outburst on the House Floor during the President’s speech last Wednesday night.  My answer has been a variation of the following: childish, stupid, idiotic, unbecoming, or boorish.

Look, the President of the United States of America was giving a speech to a Joint Session of Congress.  There are rules of decorum – like when there is a regular debate on the House floor, it is “not in order” to shout out interruptions.

Yes, there is a long history of antics on the House floor, but that is not an excuse for Joe Wilson’s behavior.

Personally, I think the Republican Conference should have immediately censured him, and since they didn’t, there is a good chance the Democrats will do it for them.  Frankly, he deserves it.

I received an email today from my brother-in-law that he had written to mark the 8^th anniversary of the horrific terrorist attacks of 9/11 2001.  It is excellent.

Like most of you, I remember clearly where I was and what I was doing when news of the attacks was received on September 11, 2001.  Shortly after the first tower fell, I was driving my daughter to work, and I recall making the comment, ‘The world will never be the same.’   Through the ensuing years that prophetic statement is being realized…..in both positive and negative ways.

A particularly positive outcome was the surge in patriotism and expressions of faith that followed.   In many ways those positive effects continue to this day.  During the aftermath, it was common to hear people speak of faith and divine intervention.

These comments were often made in business settings, where in the past it would have been very unusual to hear such pronouncements.  The comments weren’t in reference to a particular religion or belief system,  but rather references to belief in a supreme being, with expressions of gratitude for his love, protection, comfort and care. 

Another positive of singular note was the selfless sacrifice of those on flight 93, who gave their lives that others might live.  The ultimate sacrifice and evidence of true friendship.  ‘Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.’  John 15:13

My employer in 2001, Marsh & McLennan, had 1,908 colleagues based in the twin towers of the World Trade Center.  Miraculously, only 295 perished on 9/11,  an additional 54 victims were vendors, consultants and insurance company reps who were meeting with Marsh colleagues at the time of the attack.  Among the victims were a few dear friends, along with numerous acquaintances and respected colleagues.  I was a frequent visitor to Manhattan during the years before and after the attacks, and I remember the many phone calls from friends and family members confirming that I wasn’t in New York that particular week.  For several days after the attacks there was a constant stream of phone calls and emails as we networked together, confirming who was and who was not in the WTC that morning.  There were stories of loss, and amazing stories of faith and protection.  One good friend was in the lobby waiting for an elevator, fortunately the first elevator was full and while he waited for another, the plane hit the building.  He remained in the area briefly and narrowly escaped when the building came down.   Multitudes of similar stories can be told.   In remembrance, I periodically wear a lapel pin with an image of the flag, the Marsh logo and the inscription, ‘Semper Unitas’ (Always Together), 9/11/2001.

While the image of Marsh has been tarnished in the post Spitzer era, the days following 9/11 were its finest hour.  The firm responded immediately, humanely and generously.   In the 2001 annual report, MMC recorded pre-tax charges of $126 million for costs related directly to 9/11, which were not covered by MMC’s insurance program.  The insurance funded charges were many multiples of the uninsured charges incurred.  A monument to those who were lost stands in the plaza adjacent to the Marsh world headquarters in mid-town Manhattan.  It was my privilege to attend the dedication on September 11, 2003.   Eight years have now past, yet feelings remain tender during this season of the year.

My purpose in writing is not to harrow up memories of tragedy or loss.  I write in remembrance and respect for those who are gone, and more importantly, as a reminder of the transient nature of our lives and relationships, and the importance of living fully in the moment and appreciating and cherishing our families, friends and colleagues.   

Semper Unitas

HT to Matt  Lewis at PoliticsDaily blog for this great nugget from comedian Adam Carolla’s on his Sept. 9 podcast.

Well, I know we’re in the middle of this health care debate. And I know the big drug companies have all of a sudden become Beelzebub. And I don’t know if there’s a way to balance this out, or work it out, but I like them getting rich. I like them motivated by greed. I love the fact that almost all the innovative drugs come out of this country because in other countries, they’re not motivated by greed because the government has gotten involved to such a point where there’s no entrepreneurship as it pertains to the companies. And I know these guys are greedy.

Like, it’s a weird thing. Like, if you sell cars and you’re greedy, that’s fine. And if you sell real estate and you’re greedy, that’s fine. But if you do something with drugs and you’re greedy, then you’re horrible. And my thing is like, look, AIDS is not a death sentence anymore because these guys are greedy. And I know no one likes it, but I like them greedy. I like them competing. . . .

And the second we tell you you can’t get filthy rich off of this stuff is the second they go, ‘You know what, eh, I’m not gonna put so much into R and D.’ . . .

Overall, when the dust settles, here’s what I want: I want the greediest guys in the world trying to cure cancer. I want the greediest guys in the world trying to make a car that goes 200 miles on a gallon . . . so it’ll get done.

Very well put.  Government run health care destroys innovation – which is why more than 80% of the medical innovation and drug innovation comes from the United States.

The President hoped to revive his health care proposal in a speech before a joint session of Congress last night.  He failed.

One of the problems Obama has is that he has stretched the truth so much in this debate that the American people no longer take his words at face value.  He remains enamored with himself, and seems to be baffled by the lack of trust the American people.  I predict that as polling is released by weeks end, we will see that support for him on health care will continue to slip. 

Below is a fascinating treatment of his speech by AP.

FACT CHECK: Obama uses iffy math on deficit pledge

Associated Press

Calvin Woodward And Erica Werner

September 9, 2009

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090910/ap_on_go_pr_wh/us_health_care_fact_check

WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama used only-in-Washington accounting Wednesday when he promised to overhaul the nation’s health care system without adding “one dime” to the deficit. By conventional arithmetic, Democratic plans would drive up the deficit by billions of dollars.

The president’s speech to Congress contained a variety of oversimplifications and omissions in laying out what he wants to do about health insurance.

A look at some of Obama’s claims and how they square with the facts or the fuller story:

OBAMA: “I will not sign a plan that adds one dime to our deficits either now or in the future. Period.”

THE FACTS: Though there’s no final plan yet, the White House and congressional Democrats already have shown they’re ready to skirt the no-new-deficits pledge.

House Democrats offered a bill that the Congressional Budget Office said would add $220 billion to the deficit over 10 years. But Democrats and Obama administration officials claimed the bill actually was deficit-neutral. They said they simply didn’t have to count $245 billion of it — the cost of adjusting Medicare reimbursement rates so physicians don’t face big annual pay cuts.

Their reasoning was that they already had decided to exempt this “doc fix” from congressional rules that require new programs to be paid for. In other words, it doesn’t have to be paid for because they decided it doesn’t have to be paid for.

The administration also said that since Obama already had included the doctor payment in his 10-year budget proposal, it didn’t have to be counted again.

That aside, the long-term prognosis for costs of the health care legislation has not been good.

CBO Director Douglas Elmendorf had this to say in July: “We do not see the sort of fundamental changes that would be necessary to reduce the trajectory of federal health spending by a significant amount.”

___

OBAMA: “Nothing in this plan will require you or your employer to change the coverage or the doctor you have.”

THE FACTS: That’s correct, as far as it goes. But neither can the plan guarantee that people can keep their current coverage. Employers sponsor coverage for most families, and they’d be free to change their health plans in ways that workers may not like, or drop insurance altogether. The Congressional Budget Office analyzed the health care bill written by House Democrats and said that by 2016 some 3 million people who now have employer-based care would lose it because their employers would decide to stop offering it.

In the past Obama repeatedly said, “If you like your health care plan, you’ll be able to keep your health care plan, period.” Now he’s stopping short of that unconditional guarantee by saying nothing in the plan “requires” any change.

___

OBAMA: “The reforms I’m proposing would not apply to those who are here illegally.” One congressman, South Carolina Republican Joe Wilson, shouted “You lie!” from his seat in the House chamber when Obama made this assertion. Wilson later apologized.

THE FACTS: The facts back up Obama. The House version of the health care bill explicitly prohibits spending any federal money to help illegal immigrants get health care coverage. Illegal immigrants could buy private health insurance, as many do now, but wouldn’t get tax subsidies to help them. Still, Republicans say there are not sufficient citizenship verification requirements to ensure illegal immigrants are excluded from benefits they are not due.

___

OBAMA: “Don’t pay attention to those scary stories about how your benefits will be cut. … That will never happen on my watch. I will protect Medicare.”

THE FACTS: Obama and congressional Democrats want to pay for their health care plans in part by reducing Medicare payments to providers by more than $500 billion over 10 years. The cuts would largely hit hospitals and Medicare Advantage, the part of the Medicare program operated through private insurance companies.

Although wasteful spending in Medicare is widely acknowledged, many experts believe some seniors almost certainly would see reduced benefits from the cuts. That’s particularly true for the 25 percent of Medicare users covered through Medicare Advantage.

Supporters contend that providers could absorb the cuts by improving how they operate and wouldn’t have to reduce benefits or pass along costs. But there’s certainly no guarantee they wouldn’t.

___

OBAMA: Requiring insurance companies to cover preventive care like mammograms and colonoscopies “makes sense, it saves money, and it saves lives.”

THE FACTS: Studies have shown that much preventive care — particularly tests like the ones Obama mentions — actually costs money instead of saving it. That’s because detecting acute diseases like breast cancer in their early stages involves testing many people who would never end up developing the disease. The costs of a large number of tests, even if they’re relatively cheap, will outweigh the costs of caring for the minority of people who would have ended up getting sick without the testing.

The Congressional Budget Office wrote in August: “The evidence suggests that for most preventive services, expanded utilization leads to higher, not lower, medical spending overall.”

That doesn’t mean preventive care doesn’t make sense or save lives. It just doesn’t save money.

___

OBAMA: “If you lose your job or change your job, you will be able to get coverage. If you strike out on your own and start a small business, you will be able to get coverage.”

THE FACTS: It’s not just a matter of being able to get coverage. Most people would have to get coverage under the law, if his plan is adopted.

In his speech, Obama endorsed mandatory coverage for individuals, an approach he did not embrace as a candidate.

He proposed during the campaign — as he does now — that larger businesses be required to offer insurance to workers or else pay into a fund. But he rejected the idea of requiring individuals to obtain insurance. He said people would get insurance without being forced to do so by the law, if coverage were made affordable. And he repeatedly criticized his Democratic primary rival, Hillary Rodham Clinton, for proposing to mandate coverage.

“To force people to get health insurance, you’ve got to have a very harsh penalty,” he said in a February 2008 debate.

Now, he says, “individuals will be required to carry basic health insurance — just as most states require you to carry auto insurance.”

He proposes a hardship waiver, exempting from the requirement those who cannot afford coverage despite increased federal aid.

___

OBAMA: “There are now more than 30 million American citizens who cannot get coverage.”

THE FACTS: Obama time and again has referred to the number of uninsured as 46 million, a figure based on year-old Census data. The new number is based on an analysis by the Kaiser Commission on Medicaid and the Uninsured, which concluded that about two-thirds of Americans without insurance are poor or near poor. “These individuals are less likely to be offered employer-sponsored coverage or to be able to afford to purchase their own coverage,” the report said. By using the new figure, Obama avoids criticism that he is including individuals, particularly healthy young people, who choose not to obtain health insurance.

The President of the United States will address school children on Tuesday on the importance of taking responsibility for their own education, their own future and their own destiny.  If that’s indoctrination, give me more.

I have been a bit surprised by the reaction of some folks regarding Obama’s speech to kids.  Some have expressed some reservation about it, others have said they were contacting their children’s school about it, but the quote below from a Financial Times story was downright jaw-dropping over the top:

“As far as I am concerned, this is not civics education – it gives the appearance of creating a cult of personality,” said Steve Russell, a Republican senator from Oklahoma. “This is something you’d expect to see in North Korea or in Saddam Hussein’s Iraq.”

 

“Cult of personality”?  Would this Republican say the same thing if it were Ronald Reagan or George W. Bush speaking the exact same words? Not a chance.  This is hypocrisy on parade.

And if you have any doubt, the full text of the speech is posted below. Read it for yourself, and then decide whether you would want your child to hear that message.  I know that I want my kids to hear it, and they will.

Prepared Remarks of President Barack Obama
Back to School Event

Arlington, Virginia
September 8, 2009
 

The President: Hello everyone – how’s everybody doing today? I’m here with students at Wakefield High School in Arlington, Virginia. And we’ve got students tuning in from all across America, kindergarten through twelfth grade. I’m glad you all could join us today. 

I know that for many of you, today is the first day of school. And for those of you in kindergarten, or starting middle or high school, it’s your first day in a new school, so it’s understandable if you’re a little nervous. I imagine there are some seniors out there who are feeling pretty good right now, with just one more year to go. And no matter what grade you’re in, some of you are probably wishing it were still summer, and you could’ve stayed in bed just a little longer this morning.

I know that feeling. When I was young, my family lived in Indonesia for a few years, and my mother didn’t have the money to send me where all the American kids went to school. So she decided to teach me extra lessons herself, Monday through Friday – at 4:30 in the morning.   

Now I wasn’t too happy about getting up that early. A lot of times, I’d fall asleep right there at the kitchen table. But whenever I’d complain, my mother would just give me one of those looks and say, “This is no picnic for me either, buster.”

So I know some of you are still adjusting to being back at school. But I’m here today because I have something important to discuss with you. I’m here because I want to talk with you about your education and what’s expected of all of you in this new school year. 

Now I’ve given a lot of speeches about education. And I’ve talked a lot about responsibility.

I’ve talked about your teachers’ responsibility for inspiring you, and pushing you to learn. 

I’ve talked about your parents’ responsibility for making sure you stay on track, and get your homework done, and don’t spend every waking hour in front of the TV or with that Xbox. 

I’ve talked a lot about your government’s responsibility for setting high standards, supporting teachers and principals, and turning around schools that aren’t working where students aren’t getting the opportunities they deserve. 

But at the end of the day, we can have the most dedicated teachers, the most supportive parents, and the best schools in the world – and none of it will matter unless all of you fulfill your responsibilities. Unless you show up to those schools; pay attention to those teachers; listen to your parents, grandparents and other adults; and put in the hard work it takes to succeed. 

And that’s what I want to focus on today: the responsibility each of you has for your education. I want to start with the responsibility you have to yourself. 

Every single one of you has something you’re good at. Every single one of you has something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is. That’s the opportunity an education can provide. 

Maybe you could be a good writer – maybe even good enough to write a book or articles in a newspaper – but you might not know it until you write a paper for your English class. Maybe you could be an innovator or an inventor – maybe even good enough to come up with the next iPhone or a new medicine or vaccine – but you might not know it until you do a project for your science class. Maybe you could be a mayor or a Senator or a Supreme Court Justice, but you might not know that until you join student government or the debate team.

And no matter what you want to do with your life – I guarantee that you’ll need an education to do it. You want to be a doctor, or a teacher, or a police officer? You want to be a nurse or an architect, a lawyer or a member of our military? You’re going to need a good education for every single one of those careers. You can’t drop out of school and just drop into a good job. You’ve got to work for it and train for it and learn for it.

And this isn’t just important for your own life and your own future. What you make of your education will decide nothing less than the future of this country. What you’re learning in school today will determine whether we as a nation can meet our greatest challenges in the future. 

You’ll need the knowledge and problem-solving skills you learn in science and math to cure diseases like cancer and AIDS, and to develop new energy technologies and protect our environment. You’ll need the insights and critical thinking skills you gain in history and social studies to fight poverty and homelessness, crime and discrimination, and make our nation more fair and more free. You’ll need the creativity and ingenuity you develop in all your classes to build new companies that will create new jobs and boost our economy. 

We need every single one of you to develop your talents, skills and intellect so you can help solve our most difficult problems. If you don’t do that – if you quit on school – you’re not just quitting on yourself, you’re quitting on your country. 

Now I know it’s not always easy to do well in school. I know a lot of you have challenges in your lives right now that can make it hard to focus on your schoolwork.

I get it. I know what that’s like. My father left my family when I was two years old, and I was raised by a single mother who struggled at times to pay the bills and wasn’t always able to give us things the other kids had. There were times when I missed having a father in my life. There were times when I was lonely and felt like I didn’t fit in. 

So I wasn’t always as focused as I should have been. I did some things I’m not proud of, and got in more trouble than I should have. And my life could have easily taken a turn for the worse. 

But I was fortunate. I got a lot of second chances and had the opportunity to go to college, and law school, and follow my dreams. My wife, our First Lady Michelle Obama, has a similar story. Neither of her parents had gone to college, and they didn’t have much. But they worked hard, and she worked hard, so that she could go to the best schools in this country.

Some of you might not have those advantages. Maybe you don’t have adults in your life who give you the support that you need. Maybe someone in your family has lost their job, and there’s not enough money to go around. Maybe you live in a neighborhood where you don’t feel safe, or have friends who are pressuring you to do things you know aren’t right. 

But at the end of the day, the circumstances of your life – what you look like, where you come from, how much money you have, what you’ve got going on at home – that’s no excuse for neglecting your homework or having a bad attitude. That’s no excuse for talking back to your teacher, or cutting class, or dropping out of school. That’s no excuse for not trying. 

Where you are right now doesn’t have to determine where you’ll end up. No one’s written your destiny for you. Here in America, you write your own destiny. You make your own future. 

That’s what young people like you are doing every day, all across America. 

Young people like Jazmin Perez, from Roma, Texas. Jazmin didn’t speak English when she first started school. Hardly anyone in her hometown went to college, and neither of her parents had gone either. But she worked hard, earned good grades, got a scholarship to Brown University, and is now in graduate school, studying public health, on her way to being Dr. Jazmin Perez.

I’m thinking about Andoni Schultz, from Los Altos, California, who’s fought brain cancer since he was three. He’s endured all sorts of treatments and surgeries, one of which affected his memory, so it took him much longer – hundreds of extra hours – to do his schoolwork. But he never fell behind, and he’s headed to college this fall. 

And then there’s Shantell Steve, from my hometown of Chicago, Illinois. Even when bouncing from foster home to foster home in the toughest neighborhoods, she managed to get a job at a local health center; start a program to keep young people out of gangs; and she’s on track to graduate high school with honors and go on to college.

Jazmin, Andoni and Shantell aren’t any different from any of you. They faced challenges in their lives just like you do. But they refused to give up. They chose to take responsibility for their education and set goals for themselves. And I expect all of you to do the same. 

That’s why today, I’m calling on each of you to set your own goals for your education – and to do everything you can to meet them. Your goal can be something as simple as doing all your homework, paying attention in class, or spending time each day reading a book. Maybe you’ll decide to get involved in an extracurricular activity, or volunteer in your community. Maybe you’ll decide to stand up for kids who are being teased or bullied because of who they are or how they look, because you believe, like I do, that all kids deserve a safe environment to study and learn. Maybe you’ll decide to take better care of yourself so you can be more ready to learn. And along those lines, I hope you’ll all wash your hands a lot, and stay home from school when you don’t feel well, so we can keep people from getting the flu this fall and winter.

Whatever you resolve to do, I want you to commit to it. I want you to really work at it. 

I know that sometimes, you get the sense from TV that you can be rich and successful without any hard work — that your ticket to success is through rapping or basketball or being a reality TV star, when chances are, you’re not going to be any of those things. 

But the truth is, being successful is hard. You won’t love every subject you study. You won’t click with every teacher. Not every homework assignment will seem completely relevant to your life right this minute. And you won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try.

That’s OK.  Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. JK Rowling’s first Harry Potter book was rejected twelve times before it was finally published. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, “I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” 

These people succeeded because they understand that you can’t let your failures define you – you have to let them teach you. You have to let them show you what to do differently next time. If you get in trouble, that doesn’t mean you’re a troublemaker, it means you need to try harder to behave. If you get a bad grade, that doesn’t mean you’re stupid, it just means you need to spend more time studying. 

No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard work. You’re not a varsity athlete the first time you play a new sport. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice. It’s the same with your schoolwork. You might have to do a math problem a few times before you get it right, or read something a few times before you understand it, or do a few drafts of a paper before it’s good enough to hand in. 

Don’t be afraid to ask questions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. I do that every day. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of strength. It shows you have the courage to admit when you don’t know something, and to learn something new. So find an adult you trust – a parent, grandparent or teacher; a coach or counselor – and ask them to help you stay on track to meet your goals. 

And even when you’re struggling, even when you’re discouraged, and you feel like other people have given up on you – don’t ever give up on yourself. Because when you give up on yourself, you give up on your country.

The story of America isn’t about people who quit when things got tough. It’s about people who kept going, who tried harder, who loved their country too much to do anything less than their best. 

It’s the story of students who sat where you sit 250 years ago, and went on to wage a revolution and found this nation. Students who sat where you sit 75 years ago who overcame a Depression and won a world war; who fought for civil rights and put a man on the moon. Students who sat where you sit 20 years ago who founded Google, Twitter and Facebook and changed the way we communicate with each other.

So today, I want to ask you, what’s your contribution going to be? What problems are you going to solve? What discoveries will you make? What will a president who comes here in twenty or fifty or one hundred years say about what all of you did for this country?  

Your families, your teachers, and I are doing everything we can to make sure you have the education you need to answer these questions. I’m working hard to fix up your classrooms and get you the books, equipment and computers you need to learn. But you’ve got to do your part too. So I expect you to get serious this year. I expect you to put your best effort into everything you do. I expect great things from each of you. So don’t let us down – don’t let your family or your country or yourself down. Make us all proud. I know you can do it.

Thank you, God bless you, and God bless America.

A high profile resignation. This is what happens when you believe you have a mandate and allow yourself to be surrounded by extremists.  Eventually, the true character of a person is exposed, and it is so outside the mainstream, the person has to leave.

Van Jones was never a good pick for a profile position in the White House.  His resignation is the first of what will certainly be more than a dozen profile resignations before the 2010 elections.  How do I know?  I don’t, but I’m pretty certain that it’s just a matter of time before we start to learn about the history of many, many Obama appointees.  It’s obvious that the internal vetting process is a disaster, so there will be many more “adjustments” to come.

Part Deux of the spoof on my car accident and spleen removal is a great song to the tune of the old classic “Last Kiss” as done by Pearl Jam. 

The Spleen Song: a Tribute to Sean Noble

Oh, where oh where can my spleen be?
The doctor took it right out of me
It’s gone and ruptured, now it’s gone for good
I hope my lymph nodes still work like they should.

I was driving home late in my old gray car
I hadn’t driven very far
The rain came down, and straight ahead
A puddle had formed, and I hydroplaned
I couldn’t stop, my car slid to the right
I’ll never forget the sound that night
I rolled it once, and then I rolled it twice
And now my BlackBerry is living with some mice–it’s in the desert.

Oh, where oh where can my spleen be?
The doctor took it right out of me
It’s gone and ruptured, now it’s gone for good
I hope my lymph nodes still work like they should.

When I woke up, white light was shining down
There were people standing all around
It wasn’t heaven, just a cold O.R.
Dr. Casano and an 8-inch scar
I lifted my head, and looked at him and said
“Tell me doctor, will I be alright?”
“I added 30 staples, like a railroad track,”
“But your poor spleen not coming back.”
And now it’s gone, my precious little spleen
I lost my spleen on I-17.

Oh, where oh where can my spleen be?
The doctor took it right out of me
It’s gone and ruptured, now it’s gone for good
I hope my lymph nodes still work like they should.

Ooh~ spleen, Poor  spleen, Ooh~ spleen

I lost my spleen on I-17